Kirsten's musings...

Eight ways to help others this holiday season

I saw this article in last week’s Parade magazine and thought it was compelling enough to pass along.  It lists several websites that allow you to help others this holiday season.  I checked all of the URLs provided and they all seem to be valid, but as always you’ll want to do your own due diligence.

If you shop online…
GoodShop.com and GiveClicks.com donate a portion of proceeds to charity.

If you’re getting married…
IDoFoundation.org helps couples create gift registries, invitations, and party favors that benefit charitable organizations.

If you just like being nice…
Go to Avivausa.com and request a free Youmanity Token.  Register it on the website; then help out a stranger, hand them the token, and ask that they do the same.  Follow the kindness chain you started as the token travels the country.

If shoes are cluttering up your closet…
Soles4Souls.org distributes them to the poor and disaster-struck around the world.

If you have spare business apparel…
CareerGear.org (for men’s clothing) and TheWomensAlliance.org (for women’s clothing) collect donations of “lightly worn” professional attire for outfitting job candidates on interviews.

If you love stuffed animals…
StuffedAnimalsForEmergencies.org and LovingHugs.org gives your “gently used” friends to kids in need.  Locally you can check out the Teddy Bear Patrol on Warm1069.com by clicking on the “Warm Cares” link.

If you want to help out locally…
HandsOnNetwork.org and VolunteerMatch.org pair neighbors with volunteer needs.

If you enjoy surfing the Internet…
GoodSearch.com automatically donates to a favorite worthy group as you browse.

My secondary 9/11 story

Most everyone alive today can tell you where they were when they heard about the terrorist attacks on 9/11.  This could be considered their "primary" story of the day.  I was watching the news while getting ready for work.  I spent the rest of the day in state of partial denial.  I acknowledged that it had happened, but played down in my own mind the actual impact the planes would have on the buildings.  Obviously a very strange day.

My "secondary" story is a little more interesting and different.  I donate blood on a regular basis, because it's something fairly simple that I can do to help others.  My goal is to get my name engraved on a leaf in the tree mural they have on the wall, which I'll be eligible for when I hit 100 donations.  I had an appointment to donate blood on the Sunday following 9/11, but because so many people were lined up to donate, they called and asked me to wait a few weeks before coming in so they could keep supply levels consistent.

By sheer coincidence my most recent eligible date to donate was last Sunday, the 10th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks.  I wasn't sure what the crowds would be like, but I decided to go in, and if there was a big crowd I'd go home and wait a few weeks, just as I had 10 years earlier.  Unfortunately it was a very typical Sunday morning at the blood center, so I went ahead and donated my blood (#76 as I inch toward my goal).

Here's my challenge to all of you.  If you stood in a line to donate blood 10 years ago, consider going back to your local blood bank and donating again.  And then do it again 8 weeks after that.  It's a simple process that could save someone's life.

**DISCLAIMER**
I know that the requirements for donating blood are biased against a lot of people, especially homosexual males.  I know that this is unfair and unreasonable, and I agree with you on that point.  I wish I knew how to make it a fairer process and still keep everyone safe.  Hopefully this day will come soon.

Get Your Guts In Gear 2010 Ride REport

Well, the 5^th annual Pacific Northwest Get Your Guts in Gear ride happened this past weekend, so it’s time for my regular report.

Day -1
It’s rarely a good sign when your spouse says, “I have a favor to ask, but it’s totally fine if you say ‘No’.”  Fortunately what Jim wanted to know was if I was up for route-marking on Thursday, which is something he normally does.  He just had some work things to finish up and other errands to run, so he asked me to fill in.  I had no great big plans other than getting the house ready for us to go, so I said I would do it.

Day 0
Route-marking is done one day in advance, so I would be marking most of the Day 1 route on Thursday.  I met my route-marking partner, Ian, at the GYGIG office and off we went.  We would be marking from just off the Mukilteo-Clinton ferry on up to Camp #1 in Oak Harbor.  We were trying something new this year – instead of signs stapled to poles we were going to spray paint instructions on the road.  The theory is that these are easier for the riders to see.  The only bad part was the paint we were using.  It was a chalk-based spray paint that would wash away in a few weeks.  Unfortunately this stuff was very messy to deal with, and the fumes were pungent.  Ian would paint a stenciled instruction on the road and then hold the stencil out the window as we drove to try and keep the air in the car clean.  There’s still pink paint in several spots in my car.

We finally made it to Camp #1 and decided to get some lunch before heading back to the office.  The ferry Gods were not on our side – we were one row away from making the 3:30 boat so we had to wait until 4:00.  Then we had to fight through traffic to get to the pre-ride meeting.  By this point I’m already tired and the weekend hasn’t really even started yet.

Day 1
Okay, time to get started.  Crew meets at 5:00 a.m. to get everything set up before the riders get there, so we were hanging signs and cutting up fruit and bagels for the riders.  Once that’s all set and the riders are organized there’s a short ceremony that features the mayor of Edmonds and a couple of GYGIG beneficiaries.  Then the riders jump on their bikes and are on their way.

I head off to camp with the rest of the camp crew to get everything set up.  Tents, signs, tables for dining, whatever needs to be done.  Unfortunately Jim calls at one point saying that his hip is bothering him a lot on the hills and needs to be picked up.  I was in the middle of setup so we sent one of our day volunteers off to pick him up.  The rest of the day was fairly uneventful, and I spent some time laughing with some of the riders who have been involved with the ride in past years.  Luckily the predicted rain never materialized, making for a lovely evening.

Day 2
Oops, spoke too soon.  Saturday morning broke gray and dreary, and the rain started to fall before all of the riders had left.  Maybe it will clear up by the afternoon.

No such luck, the rain just got more persistent as the day wore on.  The camp crew held off on setting up tents until a break in the rain, but since it never happened we just had to forge ahead.  We also ended up putting everybody’s bags back on the truck since they were getting wet despite our best efforts to keep them covered with tarps.

As riders arrived at camp we let them know that they had the option of moving their tents into the dining hall if they so desired, and about a dozen of them took us up on that offer.  It was quite a site to see groups of four picking up pitched tents and walking them down the path from the camp area to the dining hall.  The rest of us stayed put, and fortunately the rain let up quite a bit by the time we went to bed.

I spent the evening with riders watching videos and playing cards.  We played a spirited game of Bullshit, where not only did I come in second place I managed to pull off a reverse bluff that earned the admiration of my fellow players.  Yes, Jim, I’ve been hanging out with you for too long.

Day 3
Time to head back to Edmonds.  Jim spent Saturday the car being Medical as well as backup Mechanical, so he was looking forward to getting back on the bike on Sunday.  I drove him to rest stop #1 so he could ride from there to lunch, and ended up driving another rider from rest stop #1 to rest stop #2 so he could get some rest.  Lunch on the Centennial Trail, and then Jim and I headed for holding, after a quick stop at the house to pick up some things.

Usually at holding the camp crew pitches the tents so that they can dry out, but it was damp and occasionally spitting rain so we couldn’t complete that task.  We just got the riders organized for the ride down to the closing ceremonies.

The sun did come out for the closing ceremonies, which certainly made it more enjoyable.  More short speeches by local politicians and beneficiaries, a raffle for a handmade stained-glass wall hanging, and a delicious barbecue shared with family and friends.

Jim and I hung out for a while, but eventually made our way home to get cleaned up for our traditional “Red Meat and a Martini” celebration dinner at The Keg near our house.  We both made it through dinner with our eyes open, but just barely.  We were in bed much earlier than normal, but justifiably so.

Another successful GYGIG ride with all riders completing the ride and no major injuries.  Time to rest up, and then start thinking about next year.  For more details on the ride check out:

http://ibdride.org

Get Your Guts In Gear - 2009 PNW Ride

Now that this year’s Get Your Guts In Gear is in the books, I figured it was time for a quick recap of the weekend.

Day 0
Thursday I spent the morning finishing up some last minute errands, packing and getting the house in order for our dog-sitter.  Once that was all done I headed down to Edmonds to help check in riders and crew, and then on to the pre-race meeting.  Jay (ride director) had a new video to share with the group that included a short snippet I had recorded as well as a longer scene featuring Jim.  Nice.  After the riders were dismissed the crew broke up into smaller groups to get organized.  I was going to be route marking this year, something I’ve done before, so I was able to get the rest of the team briefed on their duties for the weekend.  And break. (*clap*)

Day 1
Ugh…Friday morning is such an early wake-up call.  Mom, Jim and I had to stop off and pick up some donated items for the Opening Ceremony, which only had a few bumps in the road.  Fortunately it wasn’t raining like last year, so the riders were pumped up and ready to go.  A few words from the Mayor of Edmonds and a couple of beneficiaries and off they went.

Route marking is done one day ahead, so while the riders were making their way through Day 1, my partner and I were putting up directional signs for Day 2.  It can be a fun job if you have a good partner (I did) but it’s a little lonely because you have no interaction with the riders or other crew members except at camp.  Bonus:  For lunch I found a great hole-in-the-wall burger joint I stumbled upon a couple of years ago.

Camp 1 was at City Beach Park in Oak Harbor, on Whidbey Island.  Due to changes in the dates we were in a slightly different spot, but it all worked out in the end.  Bonus #2:  Make-your-own ice cream sundaes for dessert.  Yum.

Day 2
Since we moved the date of the ride this year we were in partial conflict with a car show that was going to be held right where we were camping, which means we had to get all of the tents down and cleared away by 6:30.  Bonus #3:  A low overnight dew point meant that the tents weren’t wet in the morning.

After route marking Day 3 we headed back to camp at the Skagit County Fairgrounds in Mount Vernon.  More conflicts – they were setting up for the fair so we were relegated to a fairly small stretch of grass for camp.    There were several jokes about “tenement housing” as the tents were set up in rows to save space.

Bonus #4:  While waiting for all of the riders to come in I managed to get in a few games of cribbage with my route marking partner and her son.

After dinner we held the second annual “Funky PJ’s” contest:


(The Tooth Fairy won)

Day 3
Bonus #3.1:  No dew again!  Woohoo!

Since there was no more route marking to do I headed off to join the lunch crew.  Lunch is served at rest stop #3 which happened to be along the Centennial Trail at Machias (between Lake Stevens and Snohomish).  The riders were very excited to be on a flat bike trail instead of hilly streets for such a large portion of the day.  (I accidentally typed ‘helly’, but I guess that works too.  J )

After lunch we packed up and headed for Holding.  For this ride all of the riders are stopped about a mile from the actual finish until everyone arrives, and then they all ride together for the last bit, along with a police escort.  Quite a sight to see.

At the Closing Ceremony there were a few more short speeches and then a barbecue where riders and crew could interact one last time before everyone headed home.  Riders and crew came from as far as Florida and England to participate this year, which was fantastic.  People who have a connection to this cause will go to great lengths to support this kind of event, which is fabulous.  And really that’s the whole reason this ride was started – not just to raise funds, but to raise awareness.  And, as Jim has said, to create a “rolling support group.”

Once we said all of our good-byes it was home to the pup, who missed us terribly, and to our traditional “red meat and a martini” meal at the Keg.  We chatted about the ride, caught each other up on what had seen and heard, and reveled in another successful ride.

Get Your Guts in Gear – It’s more than a ride, it’s an expression of love. *

*amended tag line

Make It So's Disney Magic - "Eli"

12/5/94 - 6/5/09

Jim and I were so excited when we moved into our first house - it meant that we could finally get a dog of our own.  After a couple of false starts we brought home an adorable ball of golden fur that we named 'Eli'.  He would represent the first in our pattern of naming dogs after people or characters in Disney lore.  (Walt Disney's middle name was Elias).

For the first few months all Eli wanted to do was to be in your arms licking your face.  That is when he wasn't sleeping under the hearth by the fireplace.  Always energetic, he loved everybody that came to visit him. 

Once he got to be about a year old, though, his stubborn streak began to emerge.  This was never more evident than when we tried to train him in obedience and agility.  He could obey all of the commands, if he wanted to.  Otherwise he was just as happy to play off by himself or find a new person who might pet him.  I'll never forget when he and I competed in the agility event at the 1998 National Specialty.  With all the crowds watching he actually stayed with me from start to finish.  He skipped all of the jumps (he never liked jumps) but he stayed with me for everything else.  I was so excited when we crossed the finish line that I tackled him and started crying tears of joy.  Apparently some people in the crowd wondered if I realized that he had skipped all of the jumps.  I did, but at that moment I really didn't care.

After realizing that maybe obedience and agility weren't for him, Eli was content to go for walks every afternoon and dig holes in the back yard.  I used to say he was part terrier.  And part pointer.  He didn't like to fetch either - if you threw a ball for him he would walk over to it and bark, as if to say, "Here it is!"

As Eli got older and the walks became less frequent he was content to spend his days on the recliner next to Jim or surveying his domain from a corner of the yard.  He loved just hanging out in the back yard, watching the world go by.

When I went to check on him Friday afternoon I knew something was wrong.  His breathing was labored and he wouldn't respond when I called his name and shook his shoulders.  Jim and I took him to the emergency vet who told us that something had ruptured internally because he was bleeding into his stomach.  His vital signs were not strong enough for him to handle surgery that might or might not stem the flow of blood.  We decided that he had suffered enough, and decided to put him down.  When we looked in his eyes there was nothing to see - he was already gone, it was just his stubborn will that was keeping his body alive. 

He slipped away quietly amid tears and hugs and kisses.  He will definitely be missed.

Again, is it just me?

There's a tree in our front yard that needs work that we cannot do on our own, so I called a local tree service company.  We scheduled to have them come out first thing Friday morning since I had the day off of work.  He said they'd be there about 8:30, so I made sure that I was up and dressed to deal with them.  About 9:15 he called to say that one of his guys was sick, so they'd need to reschedule.  Not great, but this needs to get done, so we settled on Saturday morning instead.

At 11:00 he called again to say that his other crew was probably going to finish their job early, so they could come to our house after lunch, about 1:00.  I went to the store and ran some errands and was back at the house in plenty of time.  Some time after 3:00 he called yet again to say that the other job had taken longer than expected so could we go back to Saturday morning.

At this point I mentioned that they weren't making a very good impression, but that I'd see them tomorrow morning.  He said that I wasn't making a very good impression, after all he can't control when people get sick or jobs run long, like that was my fault.  Then he said that maybe I should find a different company to handle the job.  Fine - they'll be out Monday to give us an estimate.

I've come to the conclusion that they never wanted the job in the first place.

Is it just me?

I recently read an interview with a country music singer who said that she didn't like dessert because it wasn't good for her.  What?

Last night at spin class one of the other riders professed his love for spin class, because it was such a great workout.  Huh?

I LIVE for dessert and I despise spin class.  I try to be reasonable about my dessert intake since isn't really good for me, but I can't make the leap to disliking it.  Same goes for spin class - I go and work hard because it is a good workout, but I certainly don't like it.

My determination on whether I like something is based on my personal preferences, and not whether or not it's good for me.  Is that strange?  Or am I alone in this line of thinking?

The Proposal

After the “’Always’ Incident” we managed to put the awkward non-proposal behind us and continue doing the long-distance thing.  Jim came to Seattle over Presidents’ Day weekend and we walked around Green Lake in the unexpected snowfall.

We made plans for a longer visit in April when Jim would come north over his school’s spring break.  While talking on the phone one night I mentioned that if he wanted to bring the engagement ring that would be okay with me.  To this day I’m not sure what changed in those two months, but I felt ready to accept his proposal.

He was due to arrive on the morning of April 6^th.  I was going to take a long lunch and pick him up from the airport, and then go back to work to finish off the day.  I was quite surprised when he called me at about 10:00 that morning - he should have been in the air at that time.  He told me that his flight was delayed due to mechanical difficulties, but that he’d keep me posted as to the new arrival time.

When he called to say that they were about to take off I recalculated in my head the time that I’d need to leave in order to be at the airport in time to pick him up.  When that time arrived I jumped in my car and headed south.  Unfortunately there was a HUGE backup on southbound I-5 that threatened to make me late.  (Remember this was in the days before cell phones and online traffic maps).

Once I finally made it through the traffic jam I pulled into the parking lot at Sea-Tac right when his plane was due to land.  I ran through the terminal and fortunately made it through security pretty quickly (again, this was before 9/11 when you could meet people at the gate) and arrived at the gate just as the doors opened to let people off the plane.  Whew.

As I waited for him to disembark, a woman walked up to me and said, “Are you Kirsten?”  When I said, “Yes” she handed me a laminated card with the letter ‘W’ on it.  As I puzzled over its meaning another person handed me a card with the letter ‘I’ on it.  As ‘L’, ‘L’, ‘Y’, etc. followed I clued into what was happening.  The passengers formed a circle around me as Jim approached, got down on one knee, and proposed.  He carried the last card, which said ‘ME?’  I said “Yes,” and the crowd erupted in applause.

One of the women who participated in this proposal offered to take a picture, and sent us a copy in our first “Congratulations” card.  (No digital cameras either)  Alaska Airlines gave him a bottle of champagne and a note to me apologizing for making him late.  I can’t even imagine how nerve-wracking it must have been for Jim to have this all planned out, and then to have it delayed by three hours.  I’m just glad I got to the gate on time.

The "Always" Incident

From fall of 1989 to spring of 1990 Jim and I did the “long-distance” thing.  He was still living in L.A. and I had come home to Seattle.  In addition to talking on the phone every night (a very expensive proposition in those days) we took turns visiting each other.  I had traveled down to L.A. over New Year’s Eve to have a belated Christmas and to go to the Park (Disneyland) to ring in the New Year.

Since we had a little time to kill that afternoon we decided to go to a movie.  “Always” (IMDb) was playing at a theater near Jim’s place so off we went.  We were a little early so after purchasing the tickets we sat in his car to talk for a while until the movie was to start, and somehow the topic of conversation of marriage came up.  I had broken off an engagement the year before so I was feeling a little gun-shy about the idea.  I told him that I loved him, but wasn’t quite ready to make that commitment just yet.  He got really quiet, and I wondered if I had completely blown it.  He told me that he had purchased a ring and was planning on giving it to me during the fireworks at the Park at midnight.  Gulp.

What he did next was just another example of how great our relationship was going to be.  He turned his baseball cap backwards on his head, a sign we had developed that meant he was switching from “boyfriend” to “best friend.”  He asked me, as a friend, if he should take the ring back and forget the whole thing, talking like I was one of his male buddies and not the girl he wanted to marry.  I was honest with him, telling him that he should hold on to the ring, because she (I) would probably come around eventually.

With that settled he turned his baseball cap back around, and we went in to see the movie and off to the Park, and didn’t bring the conversation up again that night.  It’s now been identified as the “’Always’ Incident” in our history.  It doesn’t come up very often, but it was a huge turning point in our relationship.

I'm wearing my shirt...

Paint the Bank Pink